A very wise person recently reminded me that my children will go beyond where I take them. Ah yes, the reminder that I’m not in control of much in my life. Funny how I always seem to forget that. And the idea that in a few short years these small humans will be in charge of their own lives, earning their own money (hopefully), and having families of their own seems crazy to me in light of the fact that I still have to remind them to brush their teeth and flush the toilet.

Josh married me at 22 (I was older and wiser at 23). In 10 years Calvin will be 22. And yes, I had to remind him to brush his teeth this morning before he left for school. I also got to explain what a condom was because his friends were talking about 8th grade health class where they learn to put a condom on a banana. The kid can’t find his rugby jersey that is folded and put away on the shelf in his closet, but we think kids that age can learn to use a condom properly? Hilarious.

One area where my parents excelled was in the area of sex education. I never felt out of the loop, misinformed. or in the dark. In fact, I always felt more informed and more prepared than any of my friends. I remember being in High School and going to the assembly where they tried to scare us straight by showing us pictures of diseased private parts infected by various STDs (that was also where the banana/condom instruction took place). The photos were supposed to be shocking, but they were tame compared to the textbook my mom had at home from one of her nursing classes. Photo after photo of private parts that were cracking, swollen, ready to fall off, bug infested . . . as my mom was studying for her STD tests we would look through the book and pick out the most disgusting photos and worst looking diseases on each page. I guess my mom was homeschooling before it was cool.

Anyway, we’ve taken a similar “free access to information” approach in our family and Calvin has known all the details of the birds and the bees for a long time, but I guess when you do it that early, you don’t think to discuss birth control. So I explained that purpose of the “love glove” is to keep the sperm from getting to the egg and making a baby. And to keep people from catching diseases (too bad I didn’t have any photos to use as a visual aid). I was rewarded for my efforts with, “Gross.” Then the bus came and they were off.

I’m not going to be able to take him very far in 10 short years. Good thing he isn’t limited to that.