I don’t think anyone who is local reads my blog and if they do, I’m probably not talking about them anyway. I’ll start by saying that I don’t think this is an accurate assessment of my daily life, and I can’t give a bunch of concrete examples, but it’s how I feel.
I suppose I should be flattered that people think I’m infinitely capable, but it feels like I’m the one picking up the slack for people around me instead of the other way around. Whether it’s last minute emergencies of picking something up, doing the driving for an event, or . . . (like I said, specific instances keep fading away), it would be nice not to be the “go to” person for a change. Maybe I don’t want to go to a particular event in the first place and I’m only going because there is no other adult in the family to take them. It would be great for someone to say, “If you want to stay home I’d be happy to take your kids for you” instead of, “Can my kids ride with you?”
Everyone and their mother has said over and over again, “If you need anything, just let me know,” but I’m never going to ask. Never. First of all, it’s not a need. I am capable of driving here there and everywhere and doing all the day to day things that Josh and I normally share. Second, I think the 11th commandment is Thou Shalt Not Ask For Assistance Unless Thou Art Dying which is how I ended up agoraphobic and unable to drive and nobody knew. I know, it’s a flaw. But I technically don’t need assistance, so that’s where we are today.
Anyway, my point is, I know there are a whole bunch of people like me out there who probably could use a pick-me-up. I’m totally guilty of handing out the easy “if you need anything” blank check, knowing it will never be cashed. The brave thing to do, the kind thing to do is to observe enough to see a specific need and offer to fill it. Even if they don’t take you up on it, trust me, it’s nice to be asked.