Month: January 2015

It’s not easy being me

Camille was invited to a birthday party this past weekend. It was a fabulous, western themed, family event with bouncy inflatables and a live pony. Camille was very excited about seeing the horse, “like Jade!” (her cousin’s horse), but let me know that she didn’t think she would ride it. Oh that poor thing, her brain is working overtime already. 

The excitement about the pony’s arrival was equally matched by an increase in anxiety about possibly riding the horse. See the body language? Arms tucked in across her chest like a shield — I know that move well. 

I also might have invented the “bite my fingers, but keep smiling so no one knows how nervous I am on the inside” move too. I knew she desperately wanted to ride the horse, but was too scared to actually be willing to ride the horse so I pirated some ideas from one of my favorite movies, What About Bob? and we babystepped our way to success.

First, just try on the hat. You don’t have to go near the horse, just try on the hat so I can take a picture for your cousin who rides and wears equestrian gear just like this. Come on, she’ll love it! Please?? For about 5 minutes she treated the hat like it was the carrier of an infectious disease. As if just trying on the helmet would instantly transport her onto the back of the animal. Finally she relented for about 10 seconds. 

After successfully taking the helmet on and off a few times, let’s try the chin strap. Bad idea. Two steps back. 

Abandoning the hat. How about we just pet the horse? Oh, so sweet. Just like Cousin Mia’s horse (but 1/2 the size). 

I said, how about we just sit on the back of the horse for a second and don’t go anywhere? We won’t ride. Just sit in the saddle. I was surprised she agreed. See the tension in her arms and face?
Lucky for me, the man leading the horse didn’t understand my instructions to wait and started walking a few steps with her on the horse. She tensed and froze and I clapped and cheered and yelled, “You’re doing it! You’re riding the horse!”

 When I asked her if she wanted to keep going and she nodded, I quickly slapped the helmet on her head and they were off. Tentative, but doing it. 

Look at that cautious smile. It says, “I’m doing something awesome, but I’m still unsure where this is going.”

On dry land again. She did it!

Earlier at the party she was very reserved and would only go down the slide if I was with her. But she got off the pony and raced up the ladder to the top without a second glance back at me. I love that feeling of relief. The pure joy that comes with wanting to kiss the ground as you step off an airplane is so fantastic. It’s like you just conquered the world. 

And then pony, pony, pony for the rest of the morning. I think she rode him 4 different times. 

No hands Mom!!

I’m king of the world!!!!

She was on a roll so she went by the face painting table. She rarely does that. She’s not a fan of strangers up close to her face. 

By this point the man leading the pony was checked out and chatting away on his cell phone as he guided them around the path. He was probably hoping Camille would give up so he could go sit in the shade and talk in peace. 

When we arrived she didn’t want a bandana or a sherrif’s star, but the thrill of her success spilled over into all parts of the party

even the piñata

I pray that all of the fears she faces end like this. 

Korean smorgasbord

The other day I was talking to my sister and since it was morning in Bahrain and evening in California she asked, “What are you doing today?” I thought through my mental schedule and replied, “In the afternoon we have a birthday party at the rugby club and this evening we have an Indian wedding reception to go to. What does your Saturday look like?” She said, “Oh, we’re going to a Korean smorgasbord.”

“Really?!” I asked (cause how interesting does that sound?). “No,” she replied dryly. “We are going to baseball tryouts with all of the other white people in Orange County.” When I stopped laughing (and finished wiping the tears from my eyes) I said, “My life really isn’t that exotic.” She quipped back, “You can’t fool me. I read your blog.”

Ok, so maybe it sounds a little exotic. But in real life our life feels pretty ordinary. First of all, getting ready for our formal event included all the ordinary frustrations — like not being able to find shoes or socks. Caleb ended up wearing orange athletic socks with his black hand me down suit and blue tie (Calvin’s castoff from Wendy’s wedding 4 years ago. That suit is still giving back). And of course he didn’t have dress shoes so he wore his least banged up running shoes. I didn’t want to wear heels so I was debating between flats and boots up until the last minute. At 5:40 Josh started yelling at us that we were going to be late. See, totally ordinary!

I pointed out that it was an Indian wedding reception in the Middle East and the odds of that combination being timely was next to zero. I was convinced that we could arrive 45 minutes late and still be one of the first people there, but I zipped up my boots and headed to the car. We got there within 5 minutes of the time on the invite and sure enough, there was one table seated with a large family, another table with 2 couples from our church, the 5 of us, and an entire room full of empty tables. Uh, huh. So much for being late.

45 minutes later it still hadn’t filled in much and I laughed inside when the MC said, “it’s great to see a crowd here with many more on the way. I wonder what is keeping them — the traffic, the weather?” Um, maybe because this entire country runs on inshallah time? The bride and groom hadn’t arrived yet either so it’s not like the latecomers were truly late yet, but the MC did open the buffet line so in this case, it paid to be early.

The bride and groom arrived while we were finishing up dinner. She wore a white dress, just like you’d see in the US and the groom was in a tux. Not exotic at all. It was a very nice, very sweet wedding reception, just like you’d have in the US. Except that the MC, because of his Indian accent, called the groom “Juan” all night because that is how “Vaughn” is pronounced if you’re from India I guess. It was enough to have me giggling all night, especially because Josh kept saying, “yeah Juan” under his breath.

All in all it was a great, ordinary night. The kids were well behaved and good company,

I had an excellent date that made me laugh, good food, and some friends to chat with. 
Entertaining ourselves while waiting for the action to begin (note the empty table behind us)

My triple selfie needs some work

Cheers! with tea

We were missing Carter in our sibling line up.

Meanwhile, Carter was in India, finishing up his time with the kids at the children’s home. I love this picture of him. It shows the compassionate, caring and protective kid that he is. I’m really proud of how he handled himself on this trip, including the flight home by himself. Hopefully, I’ll get some photos from him and Josh and be able to post something about the half of our family that was actually doing exotic things over Christmas break. 

glamping

In Oman we used to go camping all the time. We’d throw tents and sleeping bags on top of the car, grab a few scrap pallets of wood and find a place on the beach to spend the weekend. When we moved to Bahrain we heard that people camped here too, but scoffed when we found out that their version of “camping” was in the middle of the oil fields. Every winter people register to camp, then they pick a spot down south near the oil wells and pipes and they set up temporary homes for the season.
I don’t know if people actually live there full time or if it’s mostly a weekend activity, but it’s definitely not normal tent camping like we think of in the US. There are tents involved, but not the kind from REI. These are Bedouin style tents that house living room furniture, some have temporary bathroom facilities and running water, and lines of people in cars cruise up and down the roads in the area all weekend the way teens used to cruise popular streets on a Friday night, looking for fun. 
We have never gone out “camping” here before, because you either have to set up your own site in the middle of the dirt (yuck) or know someone who has one of the very nice camps so you have access to some of the niceties like generator power and a flush toilet, or you pay a company to host you for the evening so you get the Bahraini camping experience. 
During our last carpet shopping trip Josh was asking one of the sons what camping is actually like out there and the son was sharing how he went as the guest of a government VIP and had to eat until 3 in the morning when he was so full he felt sick (but the man kept offering food, so he had to keep eating. It’s how it’s done.) Then he mentioned that his wife’s cousin had a connection with a very nice camp and they were going to go out one evening soon and we could come as their guests if we wanted to. Yes, we did!
A few days later our friend called Josh and said it was all set up for January 3rd. Of course, Josh was leaving for India on January 2nd. Oh well. I told him I’d take lots of pictures. I really would have preferred him to go with us because I feel a bit naked in this culture when he isn’t around to act as my interpreter, cultural advisor, and male spokesperson, but I knew we were were in good hands. 

We met around 7pm and followed him on the 40 minute drive out to the middle of the desert. There are paved roads the entire way so it’s kind of like camping on the side of the highway. We pulled off the road and under an archway of little white lights. This camp was one of the nice ones. 

There was a large open space in the middle. Large enough for a few of the kids (not my kids, local kids) to do laps on a 4 wheeler. There were also 3 very large tents like the one behind Camille. They offered us tea and Arabic sweets to start the evening. Camille drank at least 5 glasses of tea throughout the night and it would have been more if she hadn’t been so busy playing. (It’s called Karak — a sweetened black tea with milk and cardamom.) 

The open sided tent with carpets on the ground. (Camille with another glass of tea)
The older men sat on the Bahraini benches that lined the edge of the tent. We were early since it was still before 8pm. Many more people came later. Our friend introduced us to the host, who was a relative of his wife. It was a big party of extended family and friends and it was an honor to be included. 

In the center of the camp was a hole where they started a big bonfire. There were also several Bahraini benches set up around the edge of the fire. That’s where I camped out. Behind the fire is a soccer “field” (two goals set up in the dirt), a volleyball court, and a small playground. It was kid paradise. 

For a first course we were given bowls of beans, both garbanzo (chickpeas) and blackeyed peas. They were warm and a bit smokey, with the right amount of acidity.
They were good, but my heart was lost to the taamia — the Egyptian style falafels. (They are made with fava beans instead of chickpeas). Mmm, I love them. Inside the kitchen area they had chicken on a vertical spit for shwarma, marinated beef strips on a grill, and they were baking fresh flatbread the traditional way. The oven looks like a huge metal bowl and the raw dough is slapped on the vertical sides; when it is cooked through it begins to release, but is caught and slapped on my plate, ready to eat.  Yum, no paleo here. 
Our friends who were also invited to attend tonight. We have a bunch of kids!

A group arrived in traditional dress, with traditional instruments to sing and dance. I would have thought it was the kind of thing that they did only for tourists, but I guess it happens when the locals get together too. 

watching the performers next to our friend from the carpet shop

If I were them, I would get tired of going round and round singing the same (??) thing over and over, but they had endurance!

There was a third tent that I peeked inside, but didn’t take any photos. In between watching the dancers and playing soccer, the kids spent plenty of time in the “game tent” playing table tennis, pool and watching whatever was playing on the gigantic TV. Definitely not roughing it. 

practicing writing their names in Arabic in the sand

More food. Endless food. Taamia for Calvin and shwarma for Caleb.

A nearby camp set off fireworks. She loved them. 

The ladies in our camp lit a few of the lanterns that float into the air using heat from the burning flame. They got a few to fly, but a few others burst into flames. 

Two of the lanterns in flight!

Sweaty and worn out from running around on the soccer field. Time to head home. 

joining the long caravan of cars home — the lights are from other camps along the side of the road

Crashing in bed after midnight. The most comfortable way to camp!

meanwhile, in India

Good grief, this week is kicking my butt. People who say if you get up early you’ll be tired at night and able to go to sleep earlier, therefore making it easier to get up early, are BIG FAT LIARS. I got up at 5:30 am four days in a row and I was still having to force myself to fall asleep at ll:30pm the past 2 nights. And getting up at 5:30 makes the day SOOO LONG. I felt like I was ready for dinner and it was only 1:30 pm. Ridiculous. This morning I gave up trying to be a mature adult (by staying up and being productive after bringing Calvin to soccer practice) so I fell back to sleep at 6 until 6:30 when my alarm went off (to make sure Caleb was up and getting ready for school). I fell asleep again while Caleb was in the shower and then a third time after he left on the bus. I finally dragged myself out of bed at 8:20 when my alarm went off for the third time so I could make it to work out class by 8:45 (I was a little bit late and I showed up with puffy sleepy eyes. Oh well.) I think I only have 4.5 more months of this. Woo hoo! I hope I survive . . .


Josh comes home from India tomorrow and as far as I can tell, they are having a great time. Josh said Carter is getting along great with all the kids, working hard, and has been an excellent traveling companion. I haven’t had a lot of contact with them, other than a few texts from Josh and my dad and a fun few minutes on FaceTime.

Carter was thrilled to tell me all about how he was at work burning bags of trash and my dad emphasized that in the trash pile they found bags of medical waste from last year’s trip so what does that tell you about how much trash there was to burn!?!? Ugh! Old medical waste. So many diseases. So gross. 
Anyway, they tossed in an empty can of spray paint (to make it pop to try and scare someone) and it exploded, but a few minutes later there was a HUGE explosion that brought everyone running. I guess in one of the bags someone had thrown away unexploded fireworks (who wastes perfectly good fireworks?!) and when they hit the fire they exploded so powerfully it blew cracks in the mortar in-between the bricks in the incinerator wall. So they had to dig through the other bags of trash to make sure there weren’t any other unexploded fireworks. (I hope they weren’t in the same bags as the discarded medical waste.) Of course there were more so Josh had to cut them open before tossing them in the fire. Better them than me . . .
Josh also said that they are having fun, enjoying the food (curry 3 times a day, of course) and that Carter is fitting right in with the kids and the rest of the team. He said it’s crazy how the kids in the home are around the same age, but Carter (our scrawny one) is so much bigger than they are. 
My dad said the work projects this trip (in addition to medical/dental care and trash burning) are putting in a garden — these are two of the team volunteers busy planting. Josh said I would like it there because there’s a lot of outdoor space and gardening possibilities. 
And building a playground at the local school where the kids from the children’s home attend. 

They also brought handmade dresses to give out to the local girls. They may have brought clothes for the boys too, but I know that my mom and some other women were sewing these pillowcase style dresses. The idea is that each dress is one of a kind, just like the children they are given to. 

My dad, next to Josh, said this village is called Snake village because the people who live there are the region’s exterminators — they go in and dig up the nests and kill the cobras so the people (who live in houses with dirt floors) are less at risk. Again, I’m glad tracking and killing cobras is not in my job description. 

Josh said Carter has been going to school with the kids in the afternoon and helping them with their English. Dr. Perry-Adams (Carter’s English teacher last year) would be amazed. (or horrified?) I guess the girls all think Carter is cute which embarrasses him. 

Hopefully I’ll have more to share after being reunited with Josh tomorrow. Carter flies home by himself on Tuesday. I think he’s both nervous and excited. And I know he’s hoping he gets bumped up to 1st Class!

travel planning from scratch

The first step in figuring out our summer plans is researching if it’s even feasible for us to take a family trip somewhere in Europe or if that will break the bank. We also want to go back to Crete in the fall, but maybe I’m being optimistic to think we can afford to do both. Josh was thinking it would be fun to go to England and Ireland and I was ready to start drinking tea and practice eating crumpets until I looked into it and found it’s number one on the list of most expensive tourist destinations in Europe. Nope.

So I thought, “how about we try the opposite of that?” and I googled cheapest countries in Europe. And then I had to get out a map, because I hadn’t heard of a bunch of them. But hey, two of the most beautiful places in the world are ones I had never heard of before we went there: Oman and Cappadocia. It might be worth a shot.

I bought an Eastern European guidebook (on its way from Amazon right now) because I’m not sure how to decide where to go. Slovenia, Hungary, Croatia, Macedonia (that’s a real place?) all mean nothing to me. Italy: I think of pasta and wine country, the Vatican and Venice. France: cafes and the Eiffel tower, Tour de France and fashion. Croatia??? Nothing. Slovenia??? No associations at all. I think it must be cold there because they both sound Russian and just like in Rocky 4 all Russians wear fur coats and hats, right?

I asked a group of friends (online ones who all live overseas) if they had any ideas for a cheap European vacation and my list grew — and I had to reference a map a few more times. Here’s how it breaks down:

Croatia is the most popular destination with 10 recommendations. Budapest got 8 (but that’s a city in Hungary — I know that because it’s not one of these newfangled countries that popped up since I left school). Prague and Slovenia got 6 recommendations each. Though many people noted that Prague isn’t as cheap as it used to be. There were several for Poland, 2 for Romania and 5 for Malta (yes, I had to get out the map to see where Malta was — it’s an island in-between Italy’s boot and the northern coast of the African continent). It’s a pretty well traveled group of military wives! There were other suggestions, but they overlapped with locations that I hope to see on a different trip (Italy and Spain). There were also suggestions to visit one of the bases in southern Germany for inexpensive outdoor fun. I’m keeping that in mind as a plan B.

So armed with my list, I now need to look up these countries (or cities), see where they are, what makes them special, discover why someone would want to go there, and determine general prices for food, lodging and transportation. Thank God for the internet, Trip Advisor, and Google street view. I don’t know how anyone traveled internationally before this century. Between reviews for hotels, apartments and restaurants I can have a great idea of what to expect once we arrive. I can even look up a hotel and using Google street view, “walk” around the area to see if there are restaurants, bike rentals, or grocery stores in the immediate area. I guess the next step will be “virtual travel.”

We may not end up going anywhere new this summer, but I can promise I’ll know a lot more about Eastern Europe after travel planning for this region!