if you’ve been following The Days of My Eyes saga, you’ll remember when we last saw our hero, I had been up to my eyeballs in drama, trying to get my brain to work with these pesky little films that are supposed to sit on my eyes and make everything clear.
Lucky for our viewers that Josh has been away for two weeks, so the latest episode of our drama was captured in real time. The case of the kidnapped contact:
Oh my white knight! What a hero. Just as Bo rescued Hope and John saved Marlena, Josh was there to save the day . . . or just make my day worse.
I start freaking out that my contact has actually migrated inside my skull, even though my knowledge of anatomy and physiology knows that shouldn’t be possible. My real life experience has shown me that these contacts are wily little buggers that will take every chance possible to cause trouble, so I can’t be sure that it hasn’t taken up residence inside my head.
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Thankfully Josh returned to talk me off the ledge before I started jamming my thumb under my eyelid searching for nothing.
All’s well that ends well, right? Except for the fact that I’m flying through sets of contacts like they’re changes of clothing. So far I’ve managed to make each pair last a week instead of a month. That is not great for my budget, but my eyes are always happier when I put in a new pair. They’re fancy like that.
So is there a resolution to the Missing Contact Mystery? Did our hero really go all day and not realize she was missing a contact? Did she lose it when crying over tangled computer chargers and headphones at work? How bad is her vision? Don’t worry, there’s no cliffhanger today . . .
Ah yes, there she is. Hiding inside the lid of the lens solution bottle. I can’t even.
I’m seriously considering switching over to a monocle.