Month: December 2020

I’m lying on the beach, 10 feet from the ocean, under an umbrella, knitting a cashmere sweater, as you do when it’s 80 degrees in December. 

My kids didn’t want to come to the beach today as “it’s boring” and instead opted to stay home and stare at screens and eat the gingerbread houses that they constructed last night. 

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Tis the season. Our last day of school was yesterday and now stretched out before us is 3 weeks of nothing. No family coming to visit, no holiday activities, no trips planned. And I’m good with that. I see it as 3 weeks of sleeping in, going to the gym and streaming TV and movies the rest of the time. 

Josh will keep working from home, except now we’ll be in his way. He’s planning to take a few days off here and there … though I’m pushing for a longer block of time to prevent burnout in 2021. 

Last year at this time Calvin was arriving, we were prepping for my sister and family to come spend Christmas with us, and we were spending my birthday weekend in Dubai. But no regrets — I’m happy we celebrated together when we did and I’m happy that my 2 boys who are in the US want to spend Christmas together. 

Intermission 

It’s now a few weeks later and we are reaching the end of our holiday. It has been a lot of Hallmark movies, Christmas movies, and TV marathons. The show Yellowstone is emotionally exhausting and painful to watch, but I can’t look away. I’m almost finished with the sleeves on my sweater. Calvin and Carter had a fun Texas Christmas and are now on their way home. 

We are spending the last 2 nights of 2020 in our favorite hotel where all the staff treat us like royalty. Josh has managed to take 9 days of vacation so we’ve been working out at the gym with Caleb, relaxing on the beach, and playing a few board games in the evening. Me playing board games might be the most unbelievable thing that has happened in 2020. 

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We return home tomorrow and then will head out to the desert to spend New Year’s Eve under the stars, ringing in the next era with sand and s’mores rather than champagne. 

And then? Back to “normal” life. Oh wait, maybe not. Breaking news on Instagram … (literally as I was writing this paragraph) we have to do the first two weeks of school in January online. 

I probably can’t express how ridiculous this is, but I will try. Because we have a 14 day quarantine in Abu Dhabi (with the lovely prison bracelets), our school admin made a request to the government that we be allowed to do the first 2 weeks of the term online so teachers and students could travel home for the holidays and then be online during quarantine days. It was especially important as many didn’t go home this summer so haven’t seen family in over a year. 

But the district said no. We would 100% be back in person on Jan 4. (Side note, they moved our Christmas holiday last minute because of our Covid testing schedule so anyone who did travel had to be back in UAE by Dec 20th, missing Christmas at home anyway). 

But now, 5 days before we are due to go back, surprise! You have to go remote now. No matter that you all gave up your vacation and that you just got Covid tested, and that your school is ready to go back … we know better and are going to tell you what to do. 

No worries that kids age 12-15 haven’t been in school since the end of February or that they can go to Bounce, to the waterpark, and to Ferrari world, but can’t go to school. It’s completely illogical. 

So cheers to you 2020, for knocking us on our butts right up to the end. (Caleb getting his Covid swab this morning that is now useless). 

I turned 47 a few weeks ago and compared to 46 . . .

I’m stronger than I was a year ago: I can do sets of 3 strict pull-ups and sets of 10 kipping pull-ups (when I’m not tired — when I’m tired, it quickly drops to 2s and 3s at a time). At 46? I could do ZERO.

I can lift more weight — I have a 205 lb deadlift and 165 lb back squat (a year ago those numbers were 150 and 140). I can squat snatch like a boss as long as I keep it under 95 lbs . . . I know, I know, NOBODY CARES. But I do, because

of all the things I accomplished this year (and truthfully that list isn’t very long), I’m most proud that as I got a year older, I became a year better physically. But it didn’t happen because I’m extra motivated or talented, but because in January, Josh got tired of hearing me complain that even after 5 years of doing CrossFit on and off, I still couldn’t do pull-ups. So he bought me 5 sessions with a personal trainer, to work on those skills for 1 hour a week outside of class and BAM

. . . nope, more like painfully, gradually, s l o w l y, I improved a little bit at a time, so by the end of the year, after 52 weeks of extra practice, I can now do a few pull-ups. Because I didn’t stop after 5 sessions, but kept going, kept paying, and kept showing up to work on little things over and over again because while I couldn’t see changes week to week, I did see them month to month. So I look back and celebrate how far I’ve come to encourage me to keep going. And to keep showing up. And to keep trying new things. And to try and keep myself from comparing my progress to others in class who those things come easily to (I’m looking at you, Caleb).

To get better at pull-ups, I had to work on my shoulder strength, and my back — my lats, which were really slacking, have been called into service. So as I got better at pull-ups, I also got better at handstand push-ups, toes to bar, and all the other things that require upper body strength. So as I hit my one goal, I found myself also winning at a bunch of other things. But not burpees, I still can barely breathe when I’m doing burpees.

In one of my favorite books, Atomic Habits, James Clear talks about how little things added up over time equal big changes — this could be applied to any area of life. Sleep habits, food consumption, TV watching . . . all areas where tiny shifts in behavior would compound over the course of a year to change my future. If I spent 30 minutes a day writing instead of watching TV, how many words would I have to show at the end of the year? If I read a chapter of the Bible instead of sleeping for 10 more minutes each day, that’s entire books of the Bible that I’d end up reading — eh, I should probably keep my sleep and drop another TV show to get those 10 minutes back. If I cut my TV time by 1 hour a day, what could I do with all those hours over the course of a year? The point is that personal development doesn’t have to be overwhelming or feel impossible. Baby steps.

I’m not a New Year’s resolution person, but I am going to pick a new physical goal for this year and try to break it down into pieces to get there bit by bit. I fear I may struggle because my trainer just left UAE and I’m not good at forcing myself to work hard, but I could probably manage 15 minutes after class a few days a week by myself. But I’ll have to plan something small enough to not be intimidating or frustrating and commit to showing up — that’s the hardest part.

Here’s to looking forward to 48!

Showing off my American Ninja Warrior skills on the obstacle course (I almost made it all the way across — next time!)

Seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper. Jeremiah 29:7

Dear Lord, thank you for 49 years of UAE as a nation. I thank you for the progress they have made in the health and prosperity of their country over the past 5 decades. I pray that as they celebrate their 50th year (throughout 2021) that it will be a time of peace and unity both within the country and beyond its borders.

Father I thank you for the blessing of living in a country that is so safe. That we don’t have to fear walking down the street or coming home to our houses at night. I thank you that we don’t fear being hijacked when stopping on the road (unlike the stories my friends tell of South Africa). I thank you for the leadership of this country. I pray that you would give them wisdom to rule wisely and with the interest of all residents in mind, not just of its citizens. I pray that the leaders of the 7 emirates would come together this next year and cooperate with one another to create policies and rules that are of benefit to all.

I thank you that the mosques have reopened for worship. I pray that they will be able to stay open and that there will be no increased cases of covid as a result. I pray that the ability of churches to meet would expand and that restrictions would be reduced. I thank you that our reliance on technology during this time has shown that there is no substitute for face to face meeting. In your wisdom you instructed us from the beginning: “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds,  not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” Heb 24-25

I thank you that the leaders of UAE allow us to worship you freely. That we can declare that you are our God. I’m thankful for the coming Abrahamic House — bringing together Christian, Muslim and Jewish people. I pray that through these expressions of faith, that all would come to know you as the one true God. I pray that our spirits would act as a witness even when we can’t speak it ourselves.

I pray for the future leaders of Abu Dhabi. As the current generation ages, Father, lift up new ones to take their place. Ones that will do your will, will care for your people, and be guided by you. I pray that as they respond to your guidance that they would be blessed beyond measure. That UAE would prosper as a result of their religious freedom and that you would bless UAE through the Christians who live here.

Please bring economic revival to this nation and to the region. Lord, there are so many people out of work, so many who were sent home and are waiting to come back. I pray for John and his team. That you would provide for them while they wait for restrictions to be lifted that will allow them to open their business again. I thank you for the announcement today that promises to bring all economic activity back to UAE within the next two weeks. I pray it will come to pass and that it includes all those who have been waiting.

I pray for the end to the tracker watches. I ask that all of them would be rendered useless. Whatever it takes — whether an act of the government deciding they are no longer needed, or they all suddenly malfunction, I pray that no one else will have to be quarantined via house arrest.

I pray for wisdom for UAE’s leaders as they make decisions on how to handle the coronavirus. Please give them peace and knowledge so they make decisions from a rational place and not from fear. I pray that their efforts would be successful and that we’d be able to have restrictions lifted in the near future. I pray that we’d be able to have people over to our house legally. That our doors would be opened to have even small groups of people meet together once again.

Please be with those who are developing and testing the vaccines. I pray that there would be one or more developed that works well and is effective, with no side effects. That distribution and cost to those in need would not be an issue. That it would stop the spread and that the virus would be wiped out in our community.

Lord, please make the UAE an example of love, justice, and mercy in the region. I pray that as things change here and as freedoms are introduced, that it won’t diminish the safety and security that we have come to enjoy. Amen.

I wrote this a year ago, but with everything in limbo, it wasn’t a good time to publish it. Now that the house has been sold and my parents are moved and settled, I’m happy to put this out there.

My parents are selling their house. Josh and I have always joked that we would buy it someday. That property has become our green retreat from the blah of the beige desert and it’s hard to believe that my favorite place on earth will no longer be there when I land in the US. I mean, it will be there, but someone else will be enjoying the clucking of chickens in the backyard, the splashing of the fountain raining down into the pond, and soaking in the sun in the front yard.

We knew a move for my parents was in the nearish future so Josh and I had talked about buying the house from them when they retire. We have looked and researched and scoured the area for a similar property over the years and have never found one we like as much. So that was our plan. To sock away money for the next year or two and when the time came, to propose that we take over ownership of our favorite plot of land.

But suddenly their retirement was in the near future, rather than the distance. What if they looked into moving now, rather than a few years from now? Josh and I didn’t have nearly enough saved to make a down payment on the property and after thinking about it for a few weeks I had the feeling that it didn’t make sense to give up our flexibility and be tied to such a big anchor back in the US when we spend 90% of our time in the Middle East. Plus, long distance home ownership adds stress and expense and I’m always looking for ways to decrease my stress, not increase it. So I told God, “Lord, I trust that someday, at the right time, you will provide a place for me to have my own garden, chickens, and green space that’s even better than 110 Apple Lane. I trust you to provide instead of trying to take matters into my own hands.” And I let it go.

About a week later, my parents got the great news that they could retire and move to southern California to be near my sisters and all of the grandkids. Such a shock. So much faster than we ever expected, but a great thing for everyone. And my heart was already prepared to let the house go.

Calvin has already found a place to move — he has been amazing with being at peace and not being stressed about being suddenly uprooted. God has provided an internship in an area that he was already working in, and housing is included.

I have no idea what next summer will look like, as when the house sells we’ll be officially homeless in the US — I’m going to have to find an address to use and change all of my banking/voting/mail info. But it will work out. Maybe we’ll travel the US in the summer and explore more of that part of the world. I’ll be keeping my eyes open for the perfect place for us someday.

And now, writing from 2020, I’m thankful that we let that dream go. I still miss it and I missed being in California this summer, but it made staying here over the summer (stuck because of Covid) a much easier choice. Now to wait and see what comes next. I’m not even going to try to guess . . .