Author: Robin Chartier

This week I was supposed to be packing for our Italian adventure, but instead I’m canceling train tickets  to Venice and Florence. I’m not feeling sorry for myself, it is what it is. I’m sort of in a mood — not happy, not sad, just functioning on a neutral plane (way better than being mad, which was last week). There are lots of new people on the island which is probably a good thing, but it’s tiring to say goodbye to old friends and put in the effort to make new ones. I think that’s part of it. I’m tired from my plans being upended and put in limbo so all the normal new arrival chit-chat seems . . . superficial? been there done that? tired? fake? I don’t think it’s any of those things, but I’m finding it more difficult than usual to muster up the effort.

It also feels a bit like I’m pregnant — NO I’M NOT. What I mean is whenever I’m on base I’m asked by everyone all the standard questions: “How is Josh doing? Any word on when he’ll be back? Are you all hanging in there?” It’s the same kind of ritual a pregnant woman goes through over and over throughout the day: “How are you feeling? When’s the baby coming? Do you have a name yet?” All well meaning, but none of the questions really have any answers. (I usually felt fat, was overdue with no end in sight and had no clue about a name and if I did, I wouldn’t have been sharing it anyway.)

So my “pregnant” answers go a bit like this:

1) Yes, I suppose Josh is fine. He messages me once a day to let me know that he’s still alive (though that’s not a concern of mine anymore). Other than that all I know is that he works long hours (working until after 11pm usually) doing something that he can’t tell me about.

2) Nope, no word on when he’ll be coming home. Maybe September? Yes, I know that’s really far away. If I tell myself September maybe I won’t have a nervous breakdown come August 25 when the kids are back in school and their dad has missed the entire summer. Best case scenario looks like late August, but I know the government is never as efficient with getting them home as they are in sending them away.

3) We’re all doing OK. Keeping busy with summer activities since we have no other choice. In fact, that’s why I’m sitting here on base right now. And why I’ll be here every day this week. Because my life has become one big loop between the base and my house since my backup shuttle driver isn’t here to do all the return trips that we had previously planned.

Since he can’t tell me what he’s doing, Josh will sometimes send news articles that point me in the right direction. This is one he sent last night. He’s not part of the group protecting the embassy:
Josh’s 4th of July

A fitting 4th

It’s 100 degrees out, why not go for a run? 
The base hosts fun runs for various holidays all year long, but we’ve never done them before — mostly because during the summer they are usually at 6am. No thanks. But this 4th of July event was held at 6pm and it had a good looking T-shirt. Besides, what else did we have to do?

A group of the kids’ friends and some parents joined in too. 

I was thinking I wouldn’t run because of Camille, but she wanted to run so I signed us both up. 
She was really excited and telling everyone how fast she is. 
On your mark, get set . . .

GO!
It was a 3k race — 2 laps around the base. The girls ran 1 lap in a little more than 10 minutes. Camille ran almost the entire time and didn’t complain a bit. She loved it. 
(I prefer the way YouTube formats the videos, but uploading them directly is faster)
There were over 200 runners (that’s how many tshirts they had and they ran out) and Calvin finished in the top 50.

Caleb is a beast. He finished right behind Calvin and then ran back to find his friends and finish again with them. 

The littlest runners showing off their shirts

Happy 4th to you!

for daddy

She misses you. 
She drew a picture of the two of you together and wrapped it in wrapping paper and said, “Daddy is going to love it!”
Love you! xoxo

small victories

Calvin finally has an ID. We went in on Friday after church, secretly suspecting that they wouldn’t be open, but they actually were. It felt like going to the DMV on a Sunday — only 2 other people knew of the best kept secret on base. We were out of there in about 30 minutes (a friend waited 5 hours for a new ID card the other day). I’ll never go during the week again.

I also got the boys set up with bank accounts/debit cards. Calvin needed an account for direct deposit for his job so like everything we do, we did it in bulk. They all now have usernames/passwords/PIN numbers and security codes. It took over an hour to get each kid set up with online banking. It’s funny how their different personalities shine through in everything we do. Calvin was straightforward and mature in his choices — standard security questions about grandparents and school, no surprises. Carter wanted his username to be coolboy973 (no meaning to the number), but I convinced him to choose a form of his name for something as important as a bank account. When it was finally Caleb’s turn he read through the security questions and instantly selected “The name of your first girlfriend.” Really? The kid has had a girlfriend? When he typed in the name, I laughed and suggested that he needed to be able to spell the name correctly to use it for security purposes. So he switched to grandmother and typed in “barbra.” In the end, he settled on Pam. Spelling isn’t his strong suit.

But now the kids can spend to their heart’s content and I only have to hear “can we buy ______?” half as much. At the rate they are going, they will be broke in a few weeks. They only have a bunch to spend at the moment because Josh and I never had cash to give them their allowance so we kept a running tally. A forced savings plan, if you will. They better figure out how to save on their own pretty quickly.

Ramadan starts tonight. The stores are packed with Ramadan specials. Twin packs of Nutella? Yes, please. It’s funny that a holiday that is centered around fasting has all sorts of bulk food sales (rice/sugar/tomato paste/pasta — all the staples are put in Ramadan packaging), but I guess all the extra special dinners and eating at night means extra shopping for people. 

Camille had her birthday this past week. I can’t believe we made it to 4. We did our traditional birthday breakfast for dinner, but Camille wanted mint chip ice cream too. She basically had bacon and ice cream for dinner. It’s good to be 4. 

She loved being the birthday girl and spent the day saying things like, “The birthday girl doesn’t want to watch that on TV!” and “The birthday girl doesn’t like being splashed in the pool.” She adored all of her presents and now every time we’re in a store she asks for things “for my birthday.” Sorry kid. It’s birthDAY not birthMONTH (even though your Auntie Kristy is all about the month). 

We have a new doctor in the house! 

And a princess. 
We’ve both aged a ton in the past 4 years. 
Happy Birthday to us!

. . . and repeat

Feeling a bit sad today – Josh is
happy and content at the embassy in Iraq (seriously, he’s chatting it up in Arabic with the local embassy employees and that’s his version of Disneyland), but my life feels a bit
like groundhog day. Wake up – drive child somewhere. Get home, pick
up other children, drive them somewhere. Kill time with Camille on
base so I don’t have to drive anywhere else for two hours. She sits
at a table and plays with toys while I . . . I don’t know what I do.
I guess this. When I have 3 of the 4 kids back with me we could go
home, but why not kill a bit more time and wait for Calvin to finish
work so I don’t have to drive on base for the 3rd time in
one day?
Entertainment thanks to Play-Doh and Polly Pockets 
Yes, my child is an actual employee.
He applied for the summer internship work program and was accepted.
They went through classes on resume writing, interviewing, and
workplace ethics. He’s filled out employment forms and tax forms and
will spend the next 9 weeks working with the School Age Care program
at the child care center on base (SAC). And yes, with three boys in
the house I’ve heard more testicle jokes in the past week than I ever
thought possible. Starting with, “Calvin, how’s your SAC today?”
and devolving from there.
I’ve become a non-glorified taxi driver
and keeper of the $$$. “Mom, can I get ________?” and “Can we
________?” are the never-ending refrains. I think I’m most bugged
by the fact that we’ve spent more hours on base this past week than
in the past month, yet Josh isn’t here to eat lunch with, run into,
or drive the kids home at the end of a long day.
Everyone has been extra-nice and
supportive. “Let me know if you need anything.” “Call me if
there’s anything I can do for you.” “We are always there for you
and the kids.” I joke that it’s survivor’s guilt. Everyone who is
still here or has a husband here is so thankful that it’s not them
this time that they are happy to do whatever they can. We’ve all been
there before. Thankfully, I haven’t needed much and it’s nice to know that people care. 
We’ve been killing time in the
afternoons in the base movie theater so at least the kids are getting
the most out of our time on base. How to Train Your Dragon 2,
Maleficent, and todays’ showing is Million Dollar Arm. I can
recommend the first 2, especially Maleficent (and now that the movie
is over, I can heartily recommend Million Dollar Arm too. Especially if you’ve ever
been to India or lived in an area with a large Indian population.
It’s funny and cute and sweet).
Bob just leaned over in the theater and
said to me, “Mom, I know you’re not a movie mama, so thank you.
We’ve seen 3 movies in a row!” OK. Now it’s all worth it!
Since we had an hour to wait for Calvin, they pooled their savings and bought a lego set
I’ve got people coming over for Bible
Study at our house tonight and I haven’t figured out what we are
doing. Usually we have a long term plan, but we finished up our
previous study a few weeks ago and then people moved and went on
vacation without deciding what to read/discuss/watch next so I’m
having to wing it. I kind of want to watch one of Rob Bell’s old
Nooma videos because I love them, and they are thought provoking, but
I know he’s currently outside of the circle of accepted beliefs and
practices and I don’t want to freak anybody out. I’m probably going
to go with it because it’s where I felt drawn this morning. (Watched
it, discussed it, all was fine. It’s hard because so many people are
away that the few of us left here kind of sit around and look at each
other with much less to say than usual.)

My day started with me feeling kind of sad, but ended
well. I guess that’s all I can hope for. I’m trying to switch things
up tomorrow and do a little more driving back and forth so we do a
bit less sitting on base and waiting. One more day and then another weekend. Did I mention that I just took over as the volunteer Children’s Church director at church? (They asked. I figured that was a sign to say yes, since I never would have come up with that idea on my own.) Yes, my life is a bit nuts. (Go ahead and make a SAC joke. You know you want to!)