Author: Robin Chartier

2018 was hard. We made it to the end of the year, barely hobbling over the finish line. In the big picture, we are fine: we are all healthy, employed, and love each other, but the day to day has been a struggle.

I feel disconnected from the kids because we’re all so tired that when we are together we are a string of individuals on our own devices, with our headphones on, each consuming our preferred brain stimulus. Camille has old episodes of Full House running on a loop, Caleb watches YouTube videos of other people playing video games (I didn’t think there could be a rung below gaming on the intellectual ladder, but he found it), Carter has sports highlights on his laptop while playing something else on his phone, and I’ve got reruns of my favorite comedy series playing (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Parks and Rec, and The Office) for the 50th time because I don’t have the mental energy to learn a whole new cast of characters.

So why did 2018 kick our behinds? I think it was the wave after wave of unknowns, interspersed with crashes onto the rocks. Winter/Spring 2018 was a bundle of nerves as we anticipated retirement. Stuck in limbo between one job and needing the timing to work out just perfectly to get into the next one . . . looking back I’m amazed that we actually pulled it off. All those moving parts of packing up the house, kenneling the pets, having friends store appliances in their spare rooms over the summer, selling my car and having it stored in a hotel parking garage, getting employed, all of those cogs ended up fitting together and it worked.

But between there and here we rode the craziest rollercoaster and took a lot of unexpected twists and turns. And I’m wondering if 2019 is going to be another loop around a similar track?

We’re still waiting to hear what the future holds for Josh’s job. Today there were 4 different options that popped up, but who knows if any of them are actually possible or will actually exist in a few months. We have to see how the puzzle pieces fit together in the merger and then move from there. It feels like a game of leapfrog and we’re waiting to see how long we can stay on this lily pad until we have to leap to the next.

In the meantime, we’re trying to relax, recover, get more rest and spend more time together watching the same TV shows — hey, baby steps! Camille isn’t thrilled about most of HGTV, but she does like Chip and Joanna on Fixer Upper, whereas Carter much prefers the Property Brothers. We’ll figure it out, eventually.

This photo makes me smile because it’s a symbol of something easy in a life where so many of the daily processes are difficult.

For example, making a change to our internet/cable plan. First of all, there is the incomprehensible fact that in order to get the best price for internet you have to purchase a bundle that includes TV and phone. I’m not talking about a plan that gives a discount on each item for bundling, but it’s literally cheaper. Internet alone might be $150, but faster internet with phone and cable package is $130. I can’t even. It’s just the way things are here.

Josh figured out that we could get a faster connection for less money than we are currently paying, so he went through the process of updating our account. Except they can’t just change our package, we have to start a new plan, with a new account number, get that one installed and then cancel the old plan. And it has to be done at the end of the month because they don’t pro-rate days so if you cancel mid month, you lose the rest of the month that you’ve already paid for.

Sigh. So we jumped through the many hoops to get the new service set up at the right time and then when the installer finally came at 9pm (of course), he said they had put in the wrong order and he had the wrong equipment and I’d have to go into the store to place another order. Which of course would not work for us since we were at the end of the month and needed this set up so we could cancel our old plan before we were charged for another month.

After many phone calls back and forth between me, the installer, his supervisor, and Josh on speakerphone from Saudi they “did something” and was able to set it up and get it working that night. Of course. Usually you get the automatic “No” because it’s easier and makes it someone else’s problem, but pushing back works about 50% of the time.

Smooth sailing now, right? Nope, 2 weeks later they shut off our service without warning and it took 2 days of phone calls and visits to the office to get it started again. Why? I have no idea. Ridiculousness is normal here. I’ve been in a devilish dance with Etisalat since way back in December 2010 when we first landed in Egypt, so this is not new, but it gets really old.

And in classic form, they couldn’t just restart our TV and internet — no, they had to submit another order with a third account number and it took a manager working two phones to get someone to come set it up the next day instead of the first available appointment that was 3 days away. And of course, the installer brought another set of new equipment. Whatever buddy, let’s just get this working. Now I’ve got phones, routers, and DVR boxes  to spare. I’m almost ready to open an electronics resale shop on Dubizzle (Dubai’s version of Craigslist).

At the same time as our internet drama we were trying to get my bank account set up and my checks cashed from working at school. Every time I went to the bank there was an issue: computer is down, something is wrong with your school account, only one person working and 15 people waiting … the goal was to get my name on a local account so I wouldn’t have to wait with the masses each month to try and get cash.

But getting a joint account here is not all that easy. Some say it’s impossible, but I think that probably changes by the day. One day possible, the next day not possible. That’s normal for here. There’s a lot of weirdness related to gender roles and how much ownership of the account I actually have as a housewife and a dependent. Hopefully I won’t ever need to find out if this joint thing is real or a myth. Long tedious story short, we did it, but after it was all supposed to be completed I got a phone call saying that I had to come back in again because they had forgotten to have me sign another form. Ah yes. Nothing ever works the way it’s supposed to the first time.

As a final bit of icing on my crazy cake, every time I use my card Josh gets a text with the amount spent, the store name, and the remaining account balance. That would be great info to have if it went both ways, but no, he’s the only one to get notified of purchases. Oh well. It’s just the way it is here.

Coming full circle, when I walked into church this morning with my coffee in hand, sat down, and saw that there was a cup holder that perfectly fit my mug, I smiled because it was so unexpectedly easy. To finally have something that was seamless and without hassle was exactly what I needed. God bless and Amen.

Ringing in the new year with the entire family under one roof — not sure what next year will bring so we’re enjoying it while we can. We partied like Chartiers and spent the evening marathoning a survivalist show called Alone — people dropped in Patagonia (solo) with minimal gear, each trying to be the last one standing. We feasted on nachos and guacamole while watching people hardier than us subsist on dandelion greens and the (very) occasional fish. We ran up to the roof at midnight to watch 10 solid minutes of finale quality and quantity fireworks, and then right back to see if one of the adventurers was going to succumb to a spider bite infection (She didn’t. Herbs to the rescue!) We left off at 72 days into the adventure when they were coping with snow and 4 people still hanging on.

And we ended the year with a family photo shoot in the desert. Here’s to 2019.

• 

• 

• 

• 

We headed out to the desert on Christmas Eve, hoping for calm skies and no need to use our newly acquired air compressor (for reinflating car tires after getting stuck in the sand). The getting stuck story is in the long promised, still to come, post about our first camping trip. Of course after all this time it will be underwhelming, but I promise that it will appear soon(ish).

• 

• 

The weather was perfect, the new tents popped up easily, and the kids ran around sliding down the dunes and racing back up.

• 

• 

• 

• 

The sand sled was slow, the sandboard was fast, but heavy, and the boogie board was the best of both. Each time we camp we learn a better way to do something.

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

Our campout was a success: a dinner of South African Boerewors (sausage) with flatbread and our version of smores using dark chocolate covered digestives (cookies) as a sub for the graham crackers and chocolate (better than the original!)

Breakfast was sausage, eggs, coffee and hot chocolate. Eggs get cracked at home into a protein shake container and stored overnight on ice — no need to worry about breaking eggs in transit.

Our camping gear worked great — except our middle age bones would appreciate sleeping mats. Yes, we’re on sand, but the sand is surprisingly hard and gets chilly.

• 

• 

Thankfully this trip held no adventures except for the adventure of being in the middle of nowhere together. A few more runs up and down the dunes and then back to the city. Merry Christmas to us!

A year ago we were on the edge of change, with retirement 6 months in the future. This December we are on the other side of the retirement divide, but still wandering through the fog. The path is not clear beyond one step at a time.

Things are still unsettled at work with aftershocks happening regularly. Josh still has a job, but no boss. The only assurance he’s been given is “keep doing what you’re doing and we’ll hopefully find a place for you.” Between that and receiving messages with potential job listings, I’d say our future is as uncertain now as it was a year ago.

Strangely enough I’m at peace with that, but the general fatigue that comes from living in a state of uncertainty is wearing on me (and him, and probably the kids too). Every time Josh gets a text or phone call from work I find myself playing detective, seeing if I can tell what will be happening to us based on one half of the conversation. Its very similar in feel to being part of a deployable unit and waiting for that phone call giving us the time to go.

In reality, no matter what happens with his job, we can technically stay here through the summer. Rent is paid until September, school is paid for the year, and we could do visa runs to stay current if our residence visas were cancelled (cross over into Oman every 30 days, renewing a tourist visa each time).

Not much more to share, just laughing that this year has been one big CRAZY ball of unknown. And that a year ago I was dreaming that things would be settled and we’d be on track for Adult Life 2.0 by now. Not even close!! Oh well. It keeps us praying and keeps me flexible. 21 years of military life was perfect preparation for this.

I’m enjoying having all of us back under one roof for these 3 weeks. We aren’t doing presents, but instead have budgeted to do fun things together. #1 was a visit to Motiongate in Dubai where Camille was finally tall enough to ride the Capitol Train (she’s been waiting for 12 months).

• 

• 

• 

• 

• 

•